pseudosoldier's Articles In Work
June 22, 2004 by pseudosoldier
They're all still assclowns.
July 14, 2004 by pseudosoldier
pseudosoldier: (pointing at board showing organization of Platoon) What the fuck is that? greywar: (not looking) I know what you're pointing at. I said the same thing. ps: That is so... gw: Yeah. Well, that and the fact that they got it from [that unit that's like ours, but not nearly as nice, except for the fact that they're in a much nicer place than Hell]! I mean... SSG Eclectic Music: What? Wolf den? What's that? (ps sulks) gw: Warrant Officer Liberation Front. W...
November 11, 2004 by pseudosoldier
Please note that the Marine Corps colors are *not* Yellow and Pink, they just look like that under fluorescent lighting. Honestly, if you want to make your own colored icing, use the "professional" strength food coloring... the others just aren't vivid enough. It was the nicest I've seen GJL, though. He was truly touched that a bunch of Army pogues would get the Marines a cake, or even figure out when the Marine Corps birthday was. I clued him in that I had been a wanna-be back in High ...
October 17, 2004 by pseudosoldier
There was that time, in college, where I went with the Army ROTC. I was a sophomore, and had just come over from Navy ROTC due to poor grades. They assigned the Cadet Commander as my battle buddy, which was still intimidating to me, because I was so n00bish. Besides, the guy had been enlisted during Desert Storm, so that gave him some cred, right? Well, probably not, but I'll never know. I do remember being in the prone with him while this other cadet, another prior enlisted who was pl...
August 13, 2004 by pseudosoldier
My first day at the unit was Single Soldier Day out at a local lake. All the soldiers on post, except those with additional duties, were out at the lake having a barbeque, or playing volleyball, or hiding their beer drinking. Only those who had duty driver, or staff duty, or who were of such sufficient rank that they could not go or were able to choose not to go were not there. There were three people at the unit when the sergeant who inprocessed me called to get someone to pick me up. ...
August 2, 2004 by pseudosoldier
I'm not allowed to wear it backwards any more. Neither is SPC Blue Eyes (once she gets one). As a protest to this (and to the other uniforming "standards" recently implaced), I'm going to wear my Gortex jacket everywhere *except* in the super-air-conditioned work area. So, bleh.
August 15, 2005 by pseudosoldier
From The Soldier's Comprehensive Study Manual, 10th Edition , page 31.8, Promotions and Reductions : Q . The weapons qualification score (entered in Section A of DA Form 3355) must not be older than ________ months. A . 24 (para 3-49a, AR 600-8-19) (actually para 3-46a, AR 600-8-19; the study guide was wrong about that part, but not the other) While I'm at it, from AR 600-8-19, section 3-49, a. (1), Civilian Education: (1) College/university/business/trade schools. Poi...
July 10, 2005 by pseudosoldier
First things first: Pre-Hyptnotized Peter What Office Space character are you? brought to you by Quizilla Now that's out of the way... She came home from her two week drill talking about how we had to see the movie, we had it on the shelf still in the plastic, and they were making references to it all weekend. I've been living references to it for just over five years, now. Eight bosses - Not quite eight, but there's the Squad Leader, the Platoon Sergeant, ...
July 6, 2005 by pseudosoldier
Everything was put off again , until 0600 Tuesday morning. We were set to miss PT, but it would all be over. Of course, at 0040, I received a phone call. I managed to repeat everything that the SSG said aloud, attempting to memorize the new schedule, but it turned out all I had remembered was "go to PT as normal." I opted to call the soldiers in the morning, before they headed out to the flight line (read: I passed out almost immediately). We went to PT "as normal", and I caught up to t...
July 4, 2005 by pseudosoldier
The detail didn't happen yesterday. We're not sure entirely what the delays are, but it looks like we'll be working tonight. Today and yesterday haven't been too bad, actually, as she was able to come down for part of the weekend. It means that I haven't been sitting by the phone as diligently as I would've, but I haven't missed anything regardless. I suppose I'll do a minor summary tomorrow, assuming that we do work tonight...
July 2, 2005 by pseudosoldier
Lot less phone calls today. This is mostly because the detail happened almost as planned, this morning. Half the work done, we have been scheduled for the rest of it tomorrow. We'll see if that holds up or not; perhaps I'll get more calls this evening, or tomorrow morning. The Crow is perched in the cupboard, but my friend Jack is here with me watching movies.
July 1, 2005 by pseudosoldier
This is our first four day weekend in about a year. Most of the unit is good to go; I volunteered for a detail so that no one had to be assigned it. I also have five soldiers assigned underneath me for this. My day thus far has been fielding phone calls from the SSG in charge overall, who will continue to relay the updated times for us to show up. 1400 today has been put off, and still I wait by the phone. But the most recent call is perplexing. SFC C - Hey SGT pseudosoldier, sorry to...
June 26, 2005 by pseudosoldier
Tonight I had the pleasure of assisting in the return of the portions of my Company and our support Company that were deployed for nearly a year. I missed the ceremony inside (although I unfortunately saw a few of our SSGs "doing the Electric Slide" outside as the DJ attempted to entertain the family members through another landing delay), but I got to see everyone outside. We helped set up in the gym, while the Family Readiness Group (officers' wives, mostly) and their kids blew up balloon...
April 13, 2005 by pseudosoldier
And up walk our four n00bs, all recent graduates from the Arabic program at DLI and AIT. It suddenly dawned on me that I had more time in service than any three of them put together. I quickly moved away, screaming obscenities at them. (Actual event occurred 13APR05.)
April 20, 2006 by pseudosoldier
So far, I've passed two PT tests and two weigh-ins/body fat tests, I've gotten 100% on three academic tests, and I haven't gone apeshit. Good deal. I need to start studying Arabic again, get this academic paper done this coming week, and figure out what to do with myself for the weekend. I need to buy those bunk beds and get them delivered ($900 later), and I still need some other things for the apartment. Geez, I guess BNCOC isn't that bad, I've just got a bunch of other stuff on my ...