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Tales from a Shebih Joondi
What puts the prefix in my name
Being a
Published on June 22, 2004 By
pseudosoldier
In
Misc
There are many things a soldier is, or perhaps, should be. There are laundry lists of adjectives that the United States Army attributes them. Loyalty, Duty, Respect, Selfless Service, Honor, Integrity, Personal Courage. Tactically proficient, Technically proficient. There exist lists of traits a soldier should possess. Responsiblity. Courage, Candor, Competence, Commitment. Proficiency, Discipline, Cohesion, Morale.
Yeah. So, I'm pseudo-that.
The name, thankfully, doesn't simply stem from my feelings of inadequacy in my chosen milieu (which differs from my chosen (or, rather, appointed) field, mind you). The name has origins elsewhere, with a writer friend of mine...
Link
While assisting my brother, Pulp Junkie
Link
(whose diary is woefully un-updated), in moving his furniture, SJohn (or just John to my clan) observed that I was "toting around that sofa like some sort of pseudo-Marine." [/approximate quote] It was at this time that I was necessitated to explain my dropping out of the Navy ROTC (where I had aspired to attain "Marine option" status), and my joining of the Army ROTC. Perhaps unexpectedly, the Army has lower Grade Point Average standards than the Marines. (Although it should be noted that the Marines carry a stigma of being "Jarheads," and the least mentally nimble, it is readily apparent to me now that the Army truly is the home of some truly impressive knuckle-draggers.) SJohn then hastily amended his comments, "pseudosoldier, then." (This got us started on a conversation about roleplaying superheroes in his RISUS system
Link
due to (pronunciation) similarities between "pseudosoldier" and "supersoldier," a reference to Captain America.)
My late entry into the AROTC led to my attending "Camp Challenge" (also known as "Camp Cupcake") between my sophomore and junior years, and securing a minor scholarship (which the Army gives out like they give out brown underwear). Of course, this meant that my inability to complete my classes in my junior year (read as: I completely screwed up my college potential through my own fault and sloth) led me to fail in military matters for the SECOND time, without ever having actively served my country in any useful endeavor.
What had spurred me into going into the Navy ROTC in the first place? Why was I so interested in becoming a Marine (who, to this day, hold a greater ability to intimidate me than most other military members, with the exception of E-8/E-9 and O-7+; it's a gradiated scale, though, and I continue to build my resistance to this, as any good Junior NCO must)?
The answer to that was *another* ROTC: the Marine Corps Junior ROTC at my local high school. While in this program, I actually managed to attain the rank of Cadet Gunnery Sergeant, which sounds quite impressive in type (and actually more-so, if you say it out loud). It pales, however, when you realize that the local JROTC was only a 3-year program, and my peers were able to attain rank as high as Cadet Lieutenant Colonel. Even judging the higher "enlisted" ranks as more worthy than your lowest of Lieutenants, there were still several dozen cadets who held rank over me. This was not undeserved, because a mediocre effort *should* be met with mediocre results.
And, of course, my first exposure to the military, the very thing that started my initial drive towards the green (if a meandering stroll could be described as a drive), was GIJoe #7, bought at the newstand. That's the second issue with the Oktober Guard, when they're all captured by Cobra, and the Joes and the Russkies have to work together to get out of it. Remember that one? No? Right. So, noting my interest, dear old Dad began trying to encourage me toward a service academy. I don't know if he (or I) ever figured out that the more I was prodded, the less I performed. I became very indifferent towards the whole thing, and had only really resolved in some corner of my mind, very simply, "I will one day be in the military." (It didn't help that, at this point, I thought that military==Army, unless, y'know, you fly a jet. Then you're in the Air Force. Or, you're on a boat. Navy. But that's pretty much it.)
This trend continued. I had a nice pat answer when someone asked what I wanted to do when I grew up: "I'm going to be in the military." Well, where will you live? "The military will take care of that. Right?" Very unconcerned with the whole thing, very typical of how I went through the everyday.
And leading me, eventually, to become just a pseudosoldier.
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Comments
1
greywar
on Jun 22, 2004
I wish we had Cadet ranks now... I would be Cadet Rear Admiral Greywar... Hah... made the joke for you... no effort required!
2
Estrogen Lass
on Jun 22, 2004
No speaking privileges for that guy above. You lost all speaking and writing rights.
Anyhow.....
You aren't really a "pseudosoldier". I could name you a few if you want me to. I think you underestimate yourself. For what its worth, I thought you were one of the better NCOs while I was there. Did I tell you that SGT Timmy was out here in my BN?(He's in the reserves out here) I have to see that guy every so often. Now he was pseudo-ish. Maybe he was just an oxygen thief, too, though.
3
pseudosoldier
on Jun 22, 2004
Honestly, his "joke" was so bad, I thought he might've been sock-puppetting for
you
, but maybe he's just incredibly drunk.
I had heard that "Timmy" (most prefer "Corky," but you have a good ally in the Timmy camp: Guy is a member) was in
a
unit out there, but hadn't realized it was yours. Has he seen you yet?
4
Estrogen Lass
on Jun 23, 2004
No he hasnt seen me........but I have seen him twice and run like the dickens when I do see him approaching.
5
chiprj
on Oct 01, 2004
similarities between "pseudosoldier" and "supersoldier," a reference to Captain America
I love this comparison! I do remember reading this one, I just wasn't very commenty at the time...
6
greywar
on Oct 01, 2004
I love this comparison! I do remember reading this one, I just wasn't very commenty at the time...
I loved that movie!
7
chiprj
on Oct 01, 2004
I loved that movie!
huh?
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