Full disclaimer: If you will be offended by something that makes light of people with terminal illnesses, who are on life support, or are otherwise suffering due to severe illness DO NOT READ FURTHER. Also, don't preach to me about it, 'kay? I understand this is a sensitive area for some; it's why some units don't allow this cadence to be sung. (Still very popular amongst Marines and other macho types.)
My girl's a vegetable
She lives in a hospital
And I would do anything
To keep her alive
She hasn't got no eyes
Just holes filled with puss and flies
But I would do anything
To keep her alive
My girl ain't got no legs
Just two poles with pins and pegs
But I would do anything
To keep her alive
My girl ain't got no hair
Just a hat they put up there
But I would do anything
To keep her alive
My girl ain't got no skin
Just the bag they keep her in
AndI would do anything
To keep her alive
My girl's got her own TV
They call it an EKG
And I would do anything
To keep her alive
One time just for a joke
Pulled the plug to watch her choke
Now I can't do anything
To keep her alive